Bug’s Page

You found it!

5 years ago today

First I’m gonna do some quoting, because I’ve done some reading and this one fellow in particular really says well things that I think and have trouble saying. And they are things that I want to say (and keep saying) so that you know them.

“Love isn’t a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like ‘struggle.’ To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.”

Mr. Fred Rogers

All of us in this home love you Bug. We love you JUST the WAY you ARE; There are no caveats, there are no exceptions. It is not dependent on you doing, or talking, or thinking, or being any particular way. We already love you. All the way. Just because. You ARE worth it (it being EVERYTHING) and I’m forever glad you’re my child.

“I don’t think anyone can grow unless they’re loved exactly as they are now, appreciated for what they are rather than what they will be.

Mr. Fred Rogers

You WILL continue to grow. You will gain a higher and better and stronger understanding of yourself. You will learn to be mindful and live in the moment, allowing those things in the past (be it an hour or a year) be molehills in the past instead of mountains crushing your spirit. You will learn to navigate social situations in a way that is both true to yourself and gives you a sense of pride in your actions and behavior. You will gain understanding of how to help your body and mind focus so that you can be productive in ways of your choosing. But we don’t love you for what you will be but because of you exactly as you are now.

However…

“There is no normal life that is free of pain. It’s the very wrestling with our problems that can be the impetus for our growth.”

Mr. Fred Rogers

There is pain in our lives. There is pain, and discomfort and struggles in your life right now. But that can be the fuel that drives changes. Necessary changes. Nobody else can change you. Only YOU can change you. You MUST wrestle with these problems, honestly (especially with yourself though being honest with others leads to honestly with yourself).

And finally you must realize that all this <waves hands around> isn’t your FAULT. You don’t DESERVE discomfort, or frustrations or difficult relationships. You are NOT a bad person. It’s hard to understand in the moment but GUILT and especially SHAME aren’t helpful ways to cope. Those roads lead only to self-loathing.

Love yourself and be nice to yourself. I’m not there to help with that so you’re going to have to do some extra loving of Bug to make up for it.

-Papa

2 responses to “Bug’s Page”

  1. Jason Crist says:

    P.S. You can write me back! Write down there. 👇

    You don’t have to sign in or ANYTHING. And you and I are the only people in the world who know the page exists so it’s just a little private spot to share messages.

    Write me back! Doesn’t have to be long… just let me know you saw it k?

    -P

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.